Spider-Man: Homecoming – A (almost entirely) spoiler-free review.

The latest installment in the Marvel Cinematic Universe — and the first result of the Marvel/Sony partnership — hit theaters this past weekend, and it was a big hit. That’s good, because this is a movie that deserves to do well. It has a lot going for it, and is a solid addition to the Marvel collection. While I won’t go so far as to call it my favorite movie of the year (Wonder Woman has it beat, hands down), it’s another fun, funny, enjoyable, and overall good quality outing from Marvel’s Studios, and really nails what Spider-Man is all about.

I would give this move a solid 7.5/10, and definitely recommend you go see it. Take your wife/girlfriend/kids, too. This is the kind of superhero movie I think even a casual fan will enjoy. To see why, keep reading.

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Jack’s Bad Movies: The Craft (1996)

IMDB’s description:

A newcomer to a Catholic prep high school falls in with a trio of outcast teenage girls who practice witchcraft and they all soon conjure up various spells and curses against those who even slightly anger them.

The movie opens with Sarah (Robin Tunney) moving to a new city (LA) and she is immediately enrolled in Catholic Boarding School (CBS), which is never a good thing. Is there a movie anywhere that portrays kids in a Catholic school being well balanced who don’t become criminals? I think not. Three Gothic girls and Skeet Ulrich (the poor man’s Johnny Depp) also attend, along with Breckin Meyer, the kid who always play an idiot. He doesn’t disappoint. Skeet introduces himself to Sarah and says the three Goths are witches. Then they introduce themselves to Sarah. They are Bonnie (Neve Campbell), Rochelle (Rachel True), and Nancy Downs (Fairuza Balk).

The three goths really are witches who need a fourth person to complete their coven, and Sarah is a good choice because she is the only one with any actual magical powers as demonstrated by her pencil disappearing act ALA the Joker, only this time no one dies and the pencil just falls on her desk and she scoots it out of sight into her lap. Still pretty good. They take her to a Hot Topic (occult shop) and the woman there says what we already know, that Sarah is a natural born witch. Outside the shop a crazy old man (not claiming to be a scientist) with a snake harasses Sarah (he showed up earlier at Sarah’s new house) and all four girls wish him dead and then he gets hit by a car. This conspiracy to commit murder is a bonding experience and now they are friends, I guess.

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Wonder Woman – A (mostly) spoiler-free review

People will tell you that Wonder Woman is the best DCEU movie so far, and that’s true. People will tell you that Wonder Woman is the best female-led superhero movie of all time, and that’s also true. But Wonder Woman doesn’t need any of those qualifiers — Wonder Woman is a genuinely good movie in a way that’s refreshing. Similar to Logan but also totally different — it told a classic superhero action story in a movie that was not a typical superhero action movie, and yet the superhero action came through in spades.

Wonder Woman banner

 

This is my favorite movie of the year so far (sorry, Guardians vol 2, you were good, but not this good), and top 3 of the past few years. If this is what we have to look forward to with the DCEU going forward, then we shouldn’t have anything to worry about. I give this movie 9/10, and you should pretty much drop what you’re doing to go see it.

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Jack’s Bad Movies – Judge Dredd (1995)

IMDB’s Description

In a dystopian future, Joseph Dredd, the most famous Judge (a police officer with instant field judiciary powers), is convicted for a crime he did not commit and must face his murderous counterpart.

The exposition states that the Earth has become a wasteland and the people live in Mega-Cities. Crime is rampant, so the people create a police force known as Judges who can try, convict, and execute at their whim.

Then the movie opens to Rob Schneider, which is never a good sign. A recently released convict out on parole, Schneider gapes at the city and the scenes before him, as if he didn’t live in this city before serving his two year sentence. He must be a pretty stupid guy too, because he believes a rooftop paradise is his new court appointed living space. He arrives at his actual apartment to discover it is occupied by a gang of squatters. Then a street war breaks out and the entire block is engaged in a firefight.

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