Jack’s Bad Movies: Spawn (1997)

IMDB’s description:

An elite mercenary is killed, but comes back from Hell as a reluctant soldier of the Devil.

If you ever wanted to see the proceeds of Hollywood Junket promotions, look no further than those quotes.

The opening monologue is terrible.

The battle between Heaven and Hell has waged eternal, their armies fueled by souls harvested on Earth. The devil, Malebolgia, has sent a lieutenant to Earth to recruit men who will turn the world into a place of death in exchange for wealth and power, a place that will provide enough souls to complete his army and allow Armageddon to begin. All the Dark Lord needs now is a great soldier, someone who can lead his hordes to the gates of Heaven and burn them down.

The movie starts with a man busting into an air base in Hong Kong. As he enters the room he kicks a dude in the face, and then uses a suppressed weapon to shoot all the equipment and other people. I feel like a real assassin would have just led with the gun. Anyways, the assassin uses a super complicated method to blow up some people getting off a plane using magic technology and a rocket.

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